Wednesday, October 26, 2005

The COLOR Theory

Whether this is about humans and i'm an idealist or this is about colors and i'm a painter, will depend on your perspective.

LIFE is a joyous, gay, flamboyant canvas of colours[In Geek-tongue: Life is a visual display unit with over 4 billion colors 'true color, highest mode' at 32 bit quality of 120 dpi resolution and refresh rate of 85 Hz]
If the above hasn't convinced you yet about my mental status, let me proceed:
Colors. Every thing on this planet has color. Even humans have color. Fair-complexioned(sissies), yellow-skinned(diseased looking freaks), dark-complexioned(dudes) and of course certain chocolate brown complexioned ones(read: Me).
OK. Now that i've convinced you and ur dialling 911 on me, let me get down to business:

Objects: Every object has colour(note the usage of 'u' in colour symbolic of my love for the Queen's english). Some are blue, some are red. But all are made of the 3 primary colours. There is no colour called black. It is simply the eye registering the scarcity or lack of certain or all the colours in that object. The object which is perfectly black is not visible. But such an object does not exist.
Humans: Every human has abilities. Some are better planners, some are better decision takers. But all of them have certain basic abilities. They don't have any faults. It is simply the mind registering the inadequacy of some or all abilities in that human. A human who lacks any ability does not survive. But such a human does not exist.

Now I shall now define things people say that 1 can only feel and cannot express.
Happiness: A sensation associated solely with the mind(not heart) that is felt by an individual when he is satisfied with the outcome of an event related to his living. Men create their own happiness and are solely responsible for it. No one else can give them happiness. It is their actions alone that can produce it for them.
Pride: A feeling of extreme elation at seeing one's activity having the right effect on its environment(which includes people). Nothing wrong with it.
Self Sufficiency: The only way of life. It is how every human on this planet can truly live. It entails indifference to other people and their activities except when it gravely endangers one's happiness(defined earlier). It creates independence for a human. It retains the individuality that every one of us is born with.
Envy(Jealousy) and Hatred: The lack of the above quality results in every human's dependence on another for his actions directly or indirectly insofar as to affect his very happiness.
(A) Jealousy towards another is perversion in the sense that there is an evident lack of confidence in his own abilities.
(B) Hatred towards another(
acc to the colour theory) is possible only when one lacks certain some colours and hates others who have them. This is in fact self loathing .i.e. hatred towards one's life. Such humans are not truly alive.
Relationship: An understanding between 2 parties. It is of 2 forms:
LOVE- Possible only after self sufficiency has been reached. When one is happy, the other finds pleasure in the fact the other was capable of this self generated happiness.
PARASITISM- Possible for any human being without self sufficiency. An example will clarify this. John 'loves' Jill. He actions are to make her happy. John is happy when his actions have produced happiness for Jill. John therefore depends on Jill for his happiness. Jill can deny him this happiness by getting no happiness from his actions. So, your life is being decided by another person.

And....well....that's all there is to it.

Monday, October 17, 2005

'New's stand

NOTE: I've created a new movie review blog. So, click on THIS before you watch a flick.....
I am utterly "vetti" these one of my friends Re'Vetti' Ramanan here goes...

This is an official protest against "That-which-is-so-crappy-ugly-gross-shitty-that-it-canot-be-named" being fed to us daily at
8 am in the morning.....yeah that’s when my newspaper arrives. I am going to burn 'news'papers at the stake over here.

No quota in un-aided colleges.....Thank God.More of this and we'd need a quota for the quota-less junta.
Volkswagen-India official arrested, Taken to HYD......The police must've given him a marvelous rear-spoiler......if u know what i mean.
High Court Counsels Karishma, husband to settle dispute.....look at the injustice....even after he "court"-ed her for so long its only "....Counsels Karishma, husband to....."

Bringing alive the Desi art form....A book review...the book is about Indian Sculpture spanning 4000 years......ya.A must read.It will transport u back to that stone age era......or atleast ur skull's contents will reach the Neanderthal era.

Ludhiana: 5 killed in collision
Shahjahanpur: 4 dead in accident
Jamshedpur: 3 killed in firing
New Delhi: 5 killed in accident
Why is this column listing deaths titled BRIEFLY.......maybe it shud be called
A reminder for initiating police reforms......Ya right....'A short reminder to prompt the government to begin the visualization of the outline of a plan to fully set in motion the preliminaries to initiate police reforms........'

Whither real freedom, asked Tara Bhattacharjee(Gandhiji's grand-daughter) while inaugurating a science exhibition at The Indian School in S.Delhi.She also encouraged the 6-12 yr old children to spin and wear Khadi.........pretty reasonable.I mean...if they can understand real freedom......they can sure as hell spin Khadi clothes.
NOIDA's tenders......did you know that NOIDA means New Okhla Industrial Development from now on, no more...."Ya...his parents live in NOIDA." OR "I left my dog in NOIDA".But then what should we say...?

NIFT designs ITBP uniforms......Haute Couture for ones with the hauteur eh!!!.....Look out Paris....
UP Governor withholds bill on renaming Varsity......this was THE MOST important of the governor activities that TOI could record......I there a lapse on TOI's part or is the governor that jobless...!!!

Articles side-by-side ----->
Rs. 2200 crore Bangalore-Mysore monorail system underway
Rs. 1510 crore sought by Karnataka CM from Centre for flood relief

Krishna waters released for happy Madrasis......u now need to buy only 2 BIBO water cans per day instead of 3.....

TV Listings....and Radio Listings.....its not unusual ppl......70% of
INDIA is still rural.....

PAGE 9 :
CPI(M) destroy police buildings......Ahem....It seems a trivial piece of info but naxals do this kinda thing in my state(AP) Bihar has a proper CParty(organization)I to do all this!!!!....whoever says it isn't developed.......
Sikkim pays 13 yr old girls Rs 2500 if they submit proof of being un-married......that must definitely have marr(i)ed ur impression of North East India eh?....but hey.....thts how horrible the situation is......
Mangal Pandey opens to full house in UK ......What is with these people.....Do they WANT to see only India's under developed past......DEVDAS|LAGAAN....etc

PAGE 10 to 13 missing : Im gonna kick Vijay's a**

PAGE 14 :
Mumbai's dard(aur pani bhari) katha......

PAGE 15 :
No Iraq troop cut. Will send terrible signal to enemy says Bush........uhh.Excuse me but what/where/which enemy r u talkin about Mr. Bush.....those bearded Bedouins with their..... (surprise surprise)......US M16 subs that u gave them to fight Saddam???
Forest Fire Haze: Jakarta seeks help.........poor fellas....I mean talk about having the worst luck in the universe......Volcanoes...Earthquakes...Tsunamis...And now this......

PAGE 17 to 21 No comments: Hey...they deal with solid business figures and facts....and sports.......

PAGE 22:
Cultured Meat for veggies.....Good news for Moral Veggies...u don’t hv to feel guilty....No news for Religious Veggies.....continue with ur grass.....

Monday, October 10, 2005

Dream fueled desires

Days ive spent lookin for u,
Nites ive spent sleepless, thinking of u,
You were so soft and oh so tender,
In all those soothing moments u render,
See how unfair this world is, will ya,
We were parted mea culpa,
Comforting than THE WIND IN THE WILLOWS,
My sweetest and dearest PILLOW.

Friday, October 07, 2005

A Class Act

Engineering is something that teaches you a lot about life.Really.A student till his +12 is a werewolf. An engg college is his full moon.Literally, He steps from the darkness of ignorance(read: innocence) into the light of knowledge(read: survival skills). He steps out from under the umbrella(read: barb wire) of his parent's protection(read: prison) into the drizzle(of professorial abuse).No.....i won't deviate. My case study of the closed confines of classroom at colleges sometimes makes me wonder:
Should we say may i come in or can i come in ?
Say MAY (request) and you show weakness to the prof.Say CAN (ability) and it shows the prof that you'll come in no matter what he says. So, sorry English teachers but I give 3 cheers to CAN.
Some students extend their hand when askin the above. Its like they r pledging to come in.("I solemnly swear by you Oh great Prof that i shall come in no matter what ur teaching, till death do us part.").Hah....Grow up people. He is not Caesar and u r not Romans.
pronunciation [pr nùnsee áysh’n]: n -- The way in which a sound, word, or language is articulated, especially in conforming to an accepted standard.Yeah I agree, but whose standards.....i hope its not the prof's.....with his bhery(very) bhery(very) prophesinal(professional) yushej(usage) of bhards(words) regarding crankshabts(crankshafts) and plybheels(flywheels). My mind has to register all this while my ears shut down screaming for help.
Punctuality is another issue altogether....ur definitely at the profs mercy here....but the trick is to ignore the prof's or the students' existence altogether when u enter late.Don't ask for permission or smile sheepishly. Look sincere and serious.Head straight to the first empty bench available.Take out some notebook and start writing furiously for at least 3 muinutes before you look up.It doesn't matter that u r being glared at by the ENTIRE class of 50 including giggling girls, the first bench prodigies and the prof who's lookin for the first chink(read: culpability) in ur armour(read: act)
Everyone knows there is 100% output loss in any circuit with the elements "Professor's Voice" and "Students Ears". So there is an MoU. Prof offers constant feed of bilge for t=60 mins with incomprehensibilty intrinsically guaranteed. Student offers a heckling free window of t=60 mins. So when he says "The differential equation can be discretized wrt time for specific nodal positions and synchronous lag analysis of the unusable heat vs real time sine curves can be done", just nod along....
greeting [gr ting]: v -- The act of addressing profs in a polite and usually conventional way by tilting the head a little and mumbling WHATEVER YOU FEEL at that instant of time. WHATEVER. Point to be noted. And the prof smiles back.No.....he's not stupid.He's just grateful to you for keeping the WHATEVER below his auditory range.
Classtests.......nothing to be dreaded. Its usually announced for the first benchers sake only. I mean face it......whether told a week in advance or an hr before, ur gonna be prepared the same way. The only thing u must ensure is ur locational advantage before the prof comes in with the Q papers. Stay close enough to not arouse suspicion and far enough to refer to ur neighbour.

Now thats what i call edutainment.....

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Thoughts in Verse

Thoughts that transcend time.
I had them in my prime.
I knew then what I would be
Forever,Immortal as far as one can see.
Difficult and different was I
But I knew not why
I realised indifference was the only way.
People told me it was a crime for which I would pay
The only non triviality in my life
Is my purpose and my drive
If you can see what I'm driving at
Join me and you'll never regret
It is your life,What I say you must believe
It is your dreams that you have to achieve.
Remember rationality is immortality
And this is an inescapable eventuality

Saturday, October 01, 2005

E-mail and E-nglish

I regularly read most mails that come on ISMD and it irks me sometimes when someone just says things not because they wanna say them but because they wanna say something.....uncrowned MORAL POLICE.....i guess they r called. So let me elaborate.....

1 there was a mail to one Dr.Banerjee(ISM alumnus) from an ISM student who lacks the basic minimum english. He also lacks knowledge of the protocol to be followed when writing formal e-mails. Excused....not all of us know these things without exposure.
2 The good Dr. sent a rather strong worded mail to the Yahoo Group with a sentence by sentence breakup of the mail painting the mistakes made in Red....Dark Bloody Red...u can say.
3 A huge deluge of mails poured in from all corners and batches condemning his attempt to correct and in a sense undermining his credibility and the essence of his immature...!!!
4 At the time of going to press there is a hot row between one Mr Animesh Saxena (self proclaimed philosopher) and the Dr.

1 Mr Saxena needs to check his premises....and stop before he further disgraces himself.
2 Any e-mail Group member has rights to voice his opinions...however bitter, unconventional and not in tune they may seem to others.
3 Rand is never understood by narrow minded self righteous so called defenders of the weak.
4 I need to stop reading these mails to which i know i wont reply.They serve no other purpose than to show me there exists sheer vanity and non-reason in this world.