The comeback

Pre-Post warning from the author: If you are an emotional girl (a.k.a. not Rahul’s type) or a sensitive guy (a.k.a. non-straight) you have 2 options, (a) Hit the next blog link that I’ve arranged in collaboration with blogger.com or (b) Go directly to the Summary at the end of the post.

I lost her sometime during October 2007. The two month search for a reason although intensely investigative led to an intestine wrenching dead-end. She was gone and it was completely my fault. I had to accept that, adapt to that and live on. I had to. Period. Chance events, completely unrelated ones even, sometimes reminded of her. Every free second I had, I thought of her. But there weren’t enough seconds. Someone said it gets easier to forget with time. And to heal. It was ironic. She’d left because I didn’t have enough time for her. But futility, they say, is invisible to oneself. And so, I never gave up hope. One day, I knew she would be back. One day.

And she did. After 8 months spent in a hazy fog of unknowing, unfeeling, I found her. And I owe it partly to Microsoft. Yes, THE big bucks Billy’s corporation. You see, I had actually known where she was all the time. Yet, the urge to talk to her, to listen to her never came. Perhaps, I was waiting for a signal. And Microsoft was the traffic cop who waved his green lighted baton at me. It happened rather unexpectedly. I was at work and had upgraded my MS Office to Office 2007. I opened Word and started typing. Suddenly the long neglected thought hit me. I stopped. Then, my fingers slowly did a CTRL + A and then a DEL. Soon, other words began to flow onto the screen. Words that had never seen daylight or cubicle-light. Words that lay shivering in the darkness of my mind. Suddenly, the chatter around me seemed annoying. So, I stopped typing. And with the image of my would-be action and its consequences clear in my mind I smiled.

That was three days ago. Today, as I write these words, she smiles back at me. I’ve brought her back. She is with me now. This sounds like an oft told tale. A tale of lost love. Doesn’t it? Well ya, it is. It is a tale of my love for words. It is the tale of the return of my desire to blog. And I’m relishing it.

(In summary, a sizeable shrapnel of my sarcastic self that seems to have subtly survived several months in solitude is seductively suggesting that surrender to it is the sole solution. Therefore, as clichéd as it may sound, I’ll still say it. “Stay tuned, there is more to come shortly.”)

Post-Post(sic) warning from the author: If you think I was being serious or will ever be, please refer to the blog title.