SPJain Group Interview

IIM Bangalore again. Light rainfall. Close to 80 candidates. 5 panels. 3 PM. Crowded and humid. I was uneasy (and quite needlessly, a little euphoric, from the previous day's MDI interview). After an expected 1 hour delay(my colleague had already warned me about SPJain's lack of punctuality), 8 of us entered a chamber where a NiceLadyProf(NLP) and a WizenedOldGentleman(WOG) sat, smiling benevolently at us.

NLP: Good afternoon everyone... My name is blah and my colleague is blah... SPJain conducts Group Interviews to get to know you as a person... blah blah... and more blah... we will have a formal discussion... but first introduce yourselves... start from here.
[I was sitting near a window close to the WOG. And the intros began from the other end. As the introductions proceeded, NLP probed the candidates for a bit more info sometimes. WOG kept looking at me constantly. And the words 'know you as a person' kept echoing in my head. By the time my turn came, his stare had done it's damage. I gave a brief introduction without my usual confident-flippant-tone. While NPC talked to a guy about his project and deadlines, I was having a silent tete-a-tete or eye-a-eye(perhaps?) with WOG. Suddenly NPC addressed the junta...]
NPC: Suppose you are a team and had to deliver something by end of today. Me and WOG are at loggerheads on how to proceed. We have taken strong positions and are not relented to each other in any way. What would you do? How would you handle this and still meet the deadline?
[I was mesmerized by WOG's eyes. The instant her sentence ended... I started rambling...]
Rahul: As far I am concerned, I would talk to you both individually and see what is the exact area of conflict. If I can't make you both compromise ultimately I will take a consensus of the rest of the group and proceed irrespective of your opinions.
[So..it was indeed rambling...not incoherent mumbling. It appeared that I could still fight the eye. My content was coming out right. But the battle with the eye was distracting me. My tone was coming out wrong.]
WOG: hmm...ok...(points to another guy) what would you do?
[Phew!! The eye turns away...]
Guy: blah...blah...
[In turns, the junta gave their individual opinions...blah blah...]
WOG: Ok...good. Now we will have a small discussion on Valentine's Day. You know what it is?
Junta(Almost in chorus): Yes.
NLP: So what do you think about V-Day and that incident that happened in Mangalore with Ram Sena...blah..blah...
[While NLP explained the issue, WOG returned to me. The Ancient Mariner was putting me in a spell. The second her sentence ended, my mouth automatically opened and....]
Rahul: I think it is something very personal and upto the individuals to decide whether to celebrate or not... and if they do want to celebrate.. in what manner they celebrate. Like religion... It should be a personal decision and not a public issue that the media and other organizations have made of it.
[It was tragic. Why was the Mariner after me??? Forget about hanging it around my neck, I don't even know what a damn albatross looks like!! The only poultry-related-crime I've committed in my life was to eat chicken. All along NLP was nodding along listening intently to me.]
WOG(interrupted towards the end and pointed to another guy): What do you think?
Junta: blah blah....(In turns, the junta spoke. One of them actually said that V-Day must be banned and we should focus our love on God and take our loved ones to temples if we were serious about them... hmm... Future Ram Sena Secretary?)
[Finally, the discussion petered out...]
WOG: Now let's take the broader issue... moral policing... women going to pubs.... what do you feel about it...?
[Yet again...the second his question ended...I spoke...sigh...Silence silence everywhere but not a fullstop to my ink. I was self-destructing.]
Rahul: It is completely against the fundamental rights we enjoy as citizens. There can be no justification for the violence they indulged in. There are laws to handle things like the Ram Sena and we must take a stand and speak out against their actions.
[The junta continued...]

As you and I can see now and as I could see then... everytime the panel asked the junta something, I'd cut in before anyone else could speak. And yet, the realisation was not strong enough to outweigh the effect of that Ancient Mariner. The rest of the discussion was about being in a hostel and not having water and a friend dying of thirst(yes.. It was as lame back then as it sounds even now) and how we'd procure water etc etc and other stuff. Every time I'd cut in and be the first to speak. I knew I was doing something terribly wrong completely unlike the rest of the junta who stayed subdued and waited for their turn to speak. No specific questions related to our profiles or education or work. Our opinion of current issues was all they wanted to know.

Result: Mr Ram Sena and me were REJECTED after Round 1 itself. I took an AC bus back and that was how it ended.

CATatonia End of the Series Editor's Note:
I got some insights into the interview process after a careful analysis of the 4 interviews. When I gave a self-generated non-cliched answer for 'why mba?' the SIBM panel disapproved. When I said playing the lead satisfies me, the MDI panel liked it. When I actually did play the lead, the SPJain panel didn't like it. When I cracked a joke in the very beginning about 'why mba?', the IMT panel rewarded me with a stress interview.
So... what does this tell you?
NOTHING.
Like I said at the very beginning....
"What follows is not a guide on how to clear interviews or how to convert them. It is just an account of how F***ED up life can get if you don't think straight."

And now... we return to our regularly scheduled programming.... with R@hul...!!!(Thunderous clapping and cheering noise.)